RIP AIM: Best Screen Name Rankings

Today’s the day AIM puts up a forever away message (hopefully something by Death Cab for Cutie, Hoobastank or Simple Plan) In its glorious honor, we’ll take a look at my favorite screen names people wrote on my RIP tombstone when I dressed up as the “Grim Reaper Who Killed AIM” this Halloween.

Screen Name on My RIP AIM Tombstone Rankings

#1: White Pimpsta

I love this so much. Pimps were on a pedestal in the AIM days and shout out to being white. I got a little inside intel that White Pimpsta’s mom made him change this screen name because actual pimps aren’t real role models. White Pimpsta then naturally became Bballplaya284798. This whole situation encapsulates the AIM era perfectly.

#2: BuffyBabe923

Their were lots of babe and chick screen names but only one that combines babe with Buffy the Vampire Slayer. What a show, screenname and time to be alive. I had a crush on SMG but couldn’t bring myself to watch this weird fantasy stuff when I knew Jim Paschke and Jon McGlocklin were calling a Bucks game.

#3: Smelly Wang

Just the audacity of this name. And the fact most guys were using AIM to flirt and this is the complete opposite. Funny thing is, this approach probably got Smelly Wang more lady attention and he learned a valuable lesson way earlier than the rest of us. It pays to be the bad boy.

#4: Skoolin_Em_03

The badass spelling of school. The basketball implication without specifically saying it. Ooooo mysterious. I think he means basketball but maybe it’s more than that…The fact that IRL Skoolin_Em had a mediocre crossover at best. I love it all.

#5: Sk8Mouse22/BurtonGirl22

This last spot is a tie. In the Warped Tour/Blink/X Games era there needed to be a nod to skating/shredding the nar pow on this list, and I like both these names. Even though I couldn’t even stand on a skateboard without (Hannah) teetering, I used to get multiple skate catalogs delivered to my house so I was in the know on the hottest Spitfire wheels and gnarliest World Industry trucks.

Note: It was hard to leave TCKLMAN off the list, but tough decisions had to be made.

With that, on this last day of AIM, I feel like this away message sums it all up perfectly.

[door shutting noise]


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